Endless Love
by GingerSnap91
Summary: Rae was use to it just always being her and her brother. She was always the tough girl, trained not to cry, not to give in to the emotions just to fight the demons and monsters out there. What happens when Rae breaks all her own rules for a Dean Winchester...will fighting demons seem much easier than falling in love? *I do not own anything from Supernatural
1. Chapter 1

I never cried. That was the rule. When you cry you show weakness. Weakness means it's easy for things to get inside, things that shouldn't be inside that is. So here I am squatting by my brother as he lies dying not crying. In all honesty that's all that kept running through my head, I had my own little chant going on. "Crying is a weakness, crying is a weakness, crying is a weakness." Over and over again but my chant was interrupted when my brother tried to sit up.

"Don't-" I gently laid him back down but adjusted him so that his head was now in my lap and waited for him to say what he needed to say.

"Rae-Rae I'm sorry,-" I had to look away; I couldn't just sit there and watch as my brother lay in my lap and struggled to talk to me. Even I had trouble watching people die. He rested his hand on top of mine which was covering his wound. I looked down at him and let him finish what he was saying.

"Remember what Dad and I taught you, but don't-don't take it so seriously sis. Live a little, remember- what we talked about. Remember I will sti-still be here, as long as you hold me in-in your memory. I-I love you baby sis." He squeezed my hand once more before taking in his final breath. My dear brother who just died quoting my father. My father always told us that before we went to sleep at night he would tuck us in smile and say "Remember I will still be here as long as you hold me in your memory." Evan was my life after Dad died; he was my partner in hunting and frankly my only friend, the only other person in my life that I really knew. He lay now in my lap dead, with his blood still all over me. It wasn't supposed to end like this. This was supposed to be our last hunt, and then he promised we could move somewhere and live a normal life. I wanted to move back home to Georgia. He promised we would; but only after this hunt. He told me that his two buddies Dean and Sam were going to join us on this one so it would be quick and easy. He even told me that I didn't have to come; I could fly down to Georgia and start getting us settled in an apartment. I just laughed and told him no way I was in, especially if it gave me the chance to meet people and make friends. Evan and I never stayed long enough anywhere to make friends but he always talked about these two, even kept in contact with him. I never met them though, they came to see Evan in New York once but I had gotten hurt and was knocked out asleep when they came. So the three of them decided they'd meet up here to get whatever it was out here and catch up. So on Monday we drove out here in Evans car, his baby. Just like always we blasted our music and only stopped for gas and we ate in the car.

We arrived at the motel on Wednesday. The only thing that had been happening here was suspicious disappearing's; nothing we hadn't seen before, we did our research and it appeared to be a demon. So this morning we decided we'd head out to them. It was our typical demon shindig. We get in, we get out. Done. Only we got in earlier than planned so the Winchester boys weren't there yet. I told Evan I thought we should wait. Something didn't feel right. He told me sure and that he was hungry. I said I'd go grab something from the place down the street. I should have never left. When I got back he was outside screaming withering in pain, his torso looked as if it had been ripped completely off with how much blood was coming out of him. The bags fell to the ground as I ran to him but before I got to him something took me to the ground. I couldn't see it, only see my brother beside me but whatever it was wasn't giving up without a fight. I was thrashing trying to get it off me when I felt something pierce my side I yelled out and gave a great kick to the weight on me. As it flew off the claws or what felt like claws swung out and swiped my face, my right eye was suddenly blinded by the blood falling over it. I cursed under my breath and scrambled up and rushed to my brother. This is where I am now. Holding my dead brother chanting "crying is weakness, over and over again, I don't know how long I sat there in the dark before the black impala pulled up next to Evans camaro. I continued to sit there chanting to myself and watch two men get out of the car and come running towards us.

"Fuck! Sam its Evan." As the one speaking got closer I gripped Evan tighter, all of a sudden I didn't want these strangers to see us like this, I didn't want them to take Evan away from me. I held on to him as they slowly approached me and squatted in front of me. The taller on glanced down at the body in my arms and then quickly turned away, as he did that I just stared. I didn't notice the shorter one staring at me until he stood up and handed the taller one a cell phone. The taller one dialed a number then walked towards the car. The shorter one squatted back in front of me and leaned in close to my face, I looked right at him for a long time before looking away. He stood up when I looked away and went to talk to the other guy; they talked for a little bit and then came over to me, once again getting on my level.

"Its Rae right?" the shorter one asked me. I stared ahead but nodded. I wanted them to go away. They weren't supposed to see Evan like this. He never liked it when people saw him weak. The taller one leaned forward so that he was in my line of vision now. I turned away from him, and came face to face with the shorter one. I then settled on looking down.

"Rae can you tell us what happened, anything at all?" I didn't answer.

"Rae when did this happen?"

"Rae why didn't you two wait for us like we asked," So these were the Winchester brothers, Dean and Sam. Those two interrogating me went on for a long time, I didn't answer one of their questions. I was angry at them for bothering me, at myself for not stopping this, I was just angry and for some reason I just couldn't find my voice. The taller one who i learned was Sam was really patient, always talking in a soothing voice, he seemed sweet. The shorter one, Dean, on the other hand was quick to lose his patience. He got snapped at by the taller one on more than one occasion to shut up. Finally they stopped asking and left me. I didn't know what they were doing at the time, but i soon learned that they were digging a grave. When Sam came up to me and pulled Evan out from my arms I snapped. I looked like a demon myself with all the blood matted in my hair and all over my body and the way I was screaming and thrashing. He picked up Evan and began to carry him to the grave and I was up so fast they didn't know what hit them.

'PUT HIM DOWN! PUT HIM DOWN! YOU CAN'T DO THIS! I SWEAR TO ZEUS I'LL KILL YOU SAM WINCHESTER! I SWEAR I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU BOTH! PUT HIM DOWN! GIVE HIM BACK! HE DOESN'T WANT PEOPLE TO SEE HIM LIKE THIS!" I wasn't making any sense but I sure as hell was yelling. Before I reached Sam, Dean caught me by the waist and held me back. I kicked and thrashed about, fighting like I was fighting for my own life.

"Let me go you fucking ass." Sam turned around and looked at Dean who was still holding me back like it was nothing.

"Rae calm down. You need to-"

"Don't tell me what to do you asshole you don't even know me! LET MY BROTHER GO! You two bastards weren't even here for him, y'all were late! You are the reason he's dead! You,You and me! Me. I'm the reason he's dead. He shouldn't be like this and he wouldn't be if it wasn't for me. " I said things to Dean that Lucifer himself would be proud of but when I started to blame them I realized I was really the one to blame. If only I had been there and not left. My body collapsed against Dean but not once did he let me go, When Sam laid Evan in the ground the fight seemed to be drained out of me completely, there was nothing left. I felt suddenly empty. I hadn't been really paying attention to what Sam was doing; instead I was now facing Dean hitting his chest yelling at him to let me go.

"Just let me go please please please let me go! He can't go like this, not like this. It wasn't supposed to be like this!" When I finished my rant I noticed that Dean had loosened his grip on me I put my hands down and looked up at him. He was looking down at me then looked up towards his brother. I turned around and noticed that Sam no longer held Evan. I rushed forward and stopped right at the edge of the grave. I didn't notice Dean until I turned to bolt but ended up in his chest. He stopped me and turned me around. He kept his hands on my shoulders while Sam buried my big brother.

"I know this is hard Rae, but he'd be hurt if you weren't there for his burial." He whispered in my ear. He was right; my brother would have stayed for mine at least. I watched until the last of the dirt was thrown on to the grave and then I turned around. I pushed Dean out of my way and I slowly walked back to wear my brothers car was, well my car now. I had planned on leaving then; leaving my brother and these two guys behind but before I could turn the key in the ignition a blinding white hot pain shot across my forehead and side. Then it spread all over my body. I felt like I was on fire from the inside, like my blood was boiling. I let out an agonized breath from the pain and the last thing I saw before I passed out was Dean Winchesters green eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

**Please Review! Also as everyone knows I only own my characters no one or anything from Supernatural. Thanks a bunches!**

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I woke up to voices that sounded nearby. While I listened I went through everything I remember but I couldn't seem to remember anything past seeing Evan buried. I slowly made my way out of bed and over to the mirror to survey the damage done. My red hair looked matted with blood and tangled like never, while my green eyes had circles so dark underneath them that they almost looked black, I had nasty straight gashes going down my face, from forehead to cheek, making me look like I got into a fight with a jungle cat...and it won. My white shirt was now dark red with blood as were my jeans but the sick thing was I couldn't tell which was mine and which was Evans, I lifted my shirt to see bruises covering my torso and a cut there too, the cut was covered with medical tape and gauze though but seemed to be bleeding through. I didn't hear the door open the rest of the way so when Dean walked up behind me I was startled. I quickly put my shirt down and turned around to look at him. I studied him for a few minutes. Taking everything in from his intense stare, his slight frown, to his muscular body type, I couldn't deny that in a different life I would have wanted him, maybe even wanted to be with him but in this life I've never had time for men. I'm twenty three years old and I've never had a real relationship, a few dates every now and then but never anything real, and I'm still a virgin. I quickly looked away and looked down. Dean's eyes unnerved me, they were beautiful don't get me wrong a brown and green and when the light hit they were almost gold, but when I looked into them I felt as if he could see right through me but I couldn't see through him. His eyes seemed to keep his secrets while I was afraid mine gave all my secrets away. I didn't find it fair. Dean cleared his throat before walking over to the vanity.

"I need to stitch you up..."

"Okay…"

"Sam and Billy are going to get your car, we were gonna let you rest up today and then go back later this week, maybe you could walk us through what happened?"

"Yeah sure." I looked up at him and smiled a little.

"Well um lay on your side and I'll stitch it..." I scooted over and then lay on my side; I felt his finger brush my skin above my jeans while he pulled my shirt up. Shivers ran through my body when he gently pushed the shirt closer to my bra line. I shifted uncomfortably but not because of him, the wound had started to throb. He must have noticed because he quickly took his hand away.

"Sorry. It was-"

"I know. It's okay." I felt him look at me but I kept my eyes ahead, I felt the first pinch of the needle and closed my eyes. I was use to this kind of stuff since I grew up on the road. While he was stitching me up he explained to me that whatever had attacked my brother and I released a poison that infected us and that's why I blacked out from the pain. Since my cuts weren't too deep the toxin left my system pretty quickly. Soon he finished and I rolled over. I felt bad for being so cold to Dean so I decided to try a different approach, so maybe things wouldn't be so awkward. After all I was probably going to be stuck with these two for a while.

'So...can a girl get a shower around here? I kind of reek..." I saw him smile for the first time, but it didn't reach his eyes.

"Yeah, there are towels in there."

"Thanks!" I took off and quickly turned the water on. I made sure it was on as hot as it would go and jumped in. I watched the blood flow down the drain and I scrubbed my body till it was almost raw. I made sure not to think about Evan only about getting clean. I scrubbed my hair and finally shut the water off. When I got out I studied the bruises that lined my body they blended in with the scars I had in my opinion.

"Shit. No clothes." I mumbled, I cracked the door to the bathroom and peaked out. No one was out there of course.

"Fuck..." I stood there for a second before walking out. I noticed that on the bed there was a t-shirt and some sweat pants. I wasn't exactly sure if they were laid out for me but I was willing to take the risk and I slipped them on. I heard voices in the next room and walked to that door. I walked out and immediately saw three guys; one was a lot older then Dean and Sam. He was at the table with Sam while Dean was leaning up against the counter. All three were so intense on their conversation that they didn't notice I had come in.

"Well I've never seen shit like that boys. It clearly wasn't a spirit but maybe not demon either..." before they could continue I coughed. All three stopped and turned to me. Sam blushed and looked down with a smile on his face. Dean took a lingering look up and down my body before smirking into his coffee. The other guy was more vocal.

"Well damn if it's not the little sister all grown up. I haven't seen you since you were first-born!" I looked at him curiously then crossed my arms over my chest.

He grinned at me and introduced himself as Bobby. I smiled at him then looked over at Sam.

"Um sorry I don't remember you…and well I don't know if these were laid out for me but I needed clothes." I heard a snicker and looked up at Dean.

"Well technically you didn't really...I mean we could have made it work I'm sure." I couldn't help the rush of blood that filled my face.

"Um no we couldn't. I need my clothes...please."

"We'll go get your stuff Rae" Sam quietly said. I smiled and thanked him then turned back into the room. Dean kept his eyes on her till she closed the door softly.

"She's a quiet one it seems like. Have y'all gotten a chance to talk to her?"

"No actually just Dean has, after she woke up for a brief second last night she would only let him touch her, not that I think she knew that she was very disoriented from the toxin.".

"Bobby let's go get her stuff and we'll let Dean help her get situated." The two men left and Dean went into the back bedroom to find me and see if I needed anything. I was staring out of the window when he came in.

"Here are some clothes for you to sleep in; they went to get your car. Figured your stuff was in it."

"Yeah thanks." We were both quiet for some time, both lost in our own thoughts.

"Rae... how did you become a hunter, I know your brothers story..."

"Can I change my bandage first?" I wasn't looking at him so I guess he nodded but he silently handed me the bandages that were on the dresser and I walked to the bathroom. After changing them I found him lying on the bed with his arms crossed under his head. I paused for a second to take the sight of him in. His arms were bulging with muscles and his shirt had risen up showing off the deep cut of hip leading to a place unknown completely to me. But one that for that brief moment I wanted to know very well. He turned to look at me and I saw him swallow then smile at me. He sat up a little and patted the spot next to him. I shook the thoughts I was having out of my head; I mean what was I thinking? I hardly knew this guy and I just lost my brother, I blamed my emotional state on my irrational thoughts and went and sat beside him.

"Relax, I don't bite. Promise." I laughed

"Sure, I bet many girls have probably offered to pay you to bite them Dean Winchester." he laughed and then went back to lying down. I grabbed a pillow and made myself more comfortable. I debated on whether I should tell him for a brief second but when I saw him looking at me something inside of me caved and I thought oh what hell.

"When my dad died I was twelve years old, I had nowhere to go, my mom was never in the picture so I went with my brother who was sixteen at the time, My father had taught him everything as you know but we lived on the go never really settling in one place for more than a few weeks. Evan at first didn't teach me things or even tell me what was going on all he would let me know is that we were stopping the bad guys and that salting the area was my job, when I turned fourteen he started to train me. Evan was all I had, he was my best friend, my only friend, my only family...he-he was my life really..." I trailed off and looked up into those eyes. I saw something there then, I saw sadness and anger and what else I couldn't tell. I didn't know why he was angry and in all honesty I didn't want to find out. I looked away. We laid like that in silence for a few minutes.

"Hey you want to watch a movie?" He suddenly asked. When he got no answer he turned to see me asleep. He quietly got up and put me under the covers and lay back down on top of them beside me. He turned on the television and soon he fell asleep as well. In my dream I was running from something but I didn't know what, I heard yelling and began to call out to whoever it was. Then I kept passing members of my family first my mom who laughed and shook her head then my father who was kneeling down crying but his tears were a dark red. Blood. Then finally I ran past Evan whose right side was missing but he kept calling out to me to remember what he and I talked about. I just kept running until Sam popped up next to me he was mouthing something but all I heard was screams. I started to panic and thought they were Deans so now when I was running I was calling out Deans name and asking where are you but when he never answered or showed up I started to cry. Dean was jerked awake when he heard me quietly mumble something; he leaned in closer and realized it was his name. I soon began to thrash around but Dean quickly grabbed my arms and shook me awake.

"Rae Rae shhh shh I'm right here. It's okay. It's okay. Shh." I covered my hands with my face with my hands and tried to calm down. After wiping my eyes and steadying my breathing I looked up at Dean who was leaning over me.

"Zeus I'm sorry Dean I didn't mean to wake you...I just that dream..." He lifted his hand and brought it to the side of my face but quickly put it down.

"What happened?" I rolled on to my side and was face to face with his chest. I took a deep breath, he smelled like the forest.

"I was just seeing my family and it seemed like I was desperate to find someone…I just don't know. I'm sorry. "

"It's okay, just try to get some sleep. I'll stay with you, if that would make you feel better."

"Yes please…if that's not too weird, I understand though if it is."

"It's not, Evan would have done it for you." For some reason I didn't like that he was trying to be my big brother. I felt a twinge in my chest at that but maybe it was just too soon for someone to playing the big brother role. But he did stay with me and I didn't remember dreaming after that. When Sam and Bobby got back he quickly went out to talk to them.

"Did you get her stuff?" Bobby nodded and put two overnight bags and the cars keys on the table. He then opened the fridge and grabbed three beers. He handed Dean one and tossed the other to Sam. The three of them sat down at the table and all drank in silence for a while.

"The place had been torn up when we got there, looked like whatever it was came back..."

"Did she say anything about the attack?" Sam asked while taking a swig of his drink.

"No but we did talk a bit. Told me about how she came to be a hunter."

"Really?" he nodded then filled them in on what she told me.

"What's she doing now?"

"She's sleeping; she crashed after talking for a bit and then woke up from a nightmare. She finally went back to sleep though. I should probably get back in there for when she wakes up again."

"Something's different with the way he's handling this one Sammy." Bobby had been watching Dean since the girl got here; he could tell that Dean was acting differently around her.

"I know...I just don't know what or why." Sam got up and began doing research while Bobby began fixing dinner. Dean lay on the bed next to me and watched TV while I slept. He didn't move once, not even when I rolled over and threw my arm over his torso. Instead he looked down at me and smiled. I slept through dinner and I slept through most of the next day. In fact I didn't wake up until four the next day. When I got up I saw my bags and I quickly grabbed a t-shirt and jeans then headed out. No one was in the house but when I looked up I saw the hood of the guy's car up so I trotted outside.

'Hey where's everyone at?!" I hollered at whoever was working on the car. Dean leaned his head to the side and took in a lingering look at me, while I took one of him. He was wearing a pair of jeans and a white wife beater, which was covered in his sweat and grease. I smiled and he grunted something which I assumed was he doesn't know then he went back to working. Not even a smile back. I shrugged and went back inside. I figured he was just concentrating on his car. After a while Sam came in.

"Hey! You're up!" He smiled and plopped down next to me on the couch.

"Yes sir I am." I smiled at him.

"Do you want to go grab a bite to eat?"

"Dear Greek gods! Yes I'm STARVED!" he laughed and we both headed outside.

'Hey Dean! Want to go with us to grab a bite?" Deans shut the hood of the Impala and took off his shirt. I blushed and looked away while he put on a navy blue shirt.

'Yeah let's go." He got in the driver's side and Sam headed that way but I quickly objected.

"Um guys? Can we take my car?" Dean looked at me like I was crazy. But Sam was quick to say of course.

"Hell no. There is no way, unless I drive." Dean said.

"What the fuck? You're not driving my car."

'You don't know how to drive that car."

'Oh please I can drive that car better than you can screw a random chick Dean." One way to piss me off is to tell me I can't do something. And when I was mad I was not to high and mighty to use all the one night stands my brother told me Dean had against him. Evan always said Dean was a ladies' man.

"No honey no one can do anything better than I can fuck." he smirked at me while Sam just shook his head and got in the car.

"I bet your all talk." He got right up to my face then and leaned down right next to my ear.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" I shoved him away while he laughed and got in. He followed and we were soon off to dinner. Half way through our meal I noticed a girl looking at Dean. She kept it up and finally he went to talk to her. Before I know it he's walking out the door with her. I couldn't help but watch the way he led her out by the small of her back and leaned in to whisper in her ear and how she leaned in to him and giggled. Girls made me sick. I looked over at Sam who was shaking his head.

"Does he do that often?" I asked.

"You'll learn. We'll have to wait for him tonight though since we only have the one car. But I'm sure we'll have fun." I could tell that Sam was really trying so for his sake I didn't let my mind wander on what Dean was doing. Me and Sam ordered another round of beers and soon were laughing and talking like old friends.

"How the hell is that your favorite movie!? It's so unrealistic!" he laughed.

"Is not! It's very possible for a woman of twenty something to have never been kissed!"

"How's that?" I didn't notice that Dean had returned and was standing behind me.

"Well in twenty-three and I'm still a virgin….I've kissed guys but not that so ha!" Sam spit his drink out while the presence standing behind me suddenly spoke.

"You're shitting me." I quickly turned around and looked up to see Dean.

'No I'm not. I never had time for boys and well...well this just got real awkward." Sam busted out laughing.

"Well it is very hard to believe but I think it just makes you have my respect Miss White." Sam said while we headed to the car. When we got back Bobby was waiting up for us.

"Fun night?" I smiled and sat down next to him, actually it would have been a lot better if you were there but yes." We all talked for a while but I soon noticed that Dean was being extra quiet. When I looked over at him I noticed he was staring at me and I quickly looked away. After dinner he had acted unusual but I tried to ignore it. Soon we decided to hit the beds and the next morning we were to go back to the warehouse. I went and brushed my teeth then walked into the room. Since Bobby's house only had two rooms and one bed in each we had to work out sleeping arrangements when it came to the three of us. The boys refused to let me sleep on the couch so I agreed to share a bed with one of them. It was more of the fact I was scared I would have nightmares and less of me being worried about their comfort. Sam said that he would take the couch since he still had to do research so that left me with Dean. Sam gave me a hug goodnight and went to the living room while Dean walked into the bathroom and shut the door. I heard the shower turn on so I changed into an old shirt of Evans and some flannel shorts then crawled in the bed. I faced the wall side so when Dean came out I acted like I was asleep.

"Rae?" I heard him whisper but I didn't respond. I heard his sigh and felt him get in the bed. For some reason I just felt drawn to Dean. Sam was becoming a close friend as was Bobby but with Dean I just was scared to let those walls down. The way he looks at me makes me feel like I don't have a stitch of clothing on most of the time and other times he makes me feel like he sees right through me and then there's the occasion where he's so moody and quiet like tonight when we got home. If I really wanted to be honest with myself I would tell myself that the reason I don't want to open up to Dean is because I'm scared of getting hurt. Dean was the first one I felt a connection with, and the first one I opened up to, I'm attracted to him. But what would happen if I gave in? I've never done anything with a guy, much less been with one in an intimate romantic relationship with one. I didn't know exactly what the feelings I was having toward Dean were but I hoped they weren't more than just friendship or just a small school girl crush. Maybe it was only because he was so attractive or I was losing my mind since the accident. I was at least going to pin it on that. I was just attracted to him because I had lost it, nothing deeper than that. I laid there thinking about all of that for a while before finally dozing off.


End file.
